Maybe because I feel like I still don't know what I want to be or who I am or where I want to go from here. Its scary not knowing what will be and not having any control of your ultimate fate. A fate that isn't revealed to you unless in some obscure way.
I want to be in control, I need to be in control of my future and where I want my life to bring to me.
Things are gonna have to change and its going to have to begin with me because ultimately I have control of my destiny and if I want to leave some kind of impact on this world whether big or small...I really need to make some changes in my life. And these changes will hopefully benefit not only me but my family because they have done so much for me because without them...I would be totally lost.
And I love them very much.